Trendy topic lately? Self love – endless quotes and people talking about self love. What is self love? To me it means loving yourself unconditionally, so you can love others the same way.
I have done a lot of research about it and I have also had many conversation about it with friends. I come across lots of perception and opinion that ” I already love myself, I’m great and confident” it almost feels like people get defensive when it comes up.
After researching many self love gurus and philosophers, I am coming up with a different approach.
You cannot really love yourself or others fully unless you have done the work. It’s more complicated than it looks on the surface.
For me it all started with realizing that I was very codependent on material things outside of myself and codependent on other people’s opinions. It was like a wake up call one day, an AHA moment. I was always looking for approval from the outside world.
I believed what other people told me about myself, I truly believed them. TRULY. If someone called me shy, I believed I was shy, I gave my power to the belief of what other people said. If someone called me beautiful, I believed them, if someone called me a bitch, I believed them, if someone called me nice, I believed them, if someone called me lazy, I believed them……
I mean, the more I think about that and look around, we all do that in some level. And today it seems crazy to me, why in the hell did I care if someone had an opinion of me.
So, it’s a really long path and story, but basically self love, is loving yourself and believing only the things that you yourself think about yourself. Your whole life will change, your whole perception of life will change, for the better. And all of a sudden you realize that “holy shit”, what I believe and say matters. I am just the same as the person next to me, you will also then realize that you, and ONLY you are responsible for your circumstances and life. You will realize that being a victim is no longer an option, because you believe in you. You will start treating yourself differently. You will start loving yourself. You will realize that you are going to become responsible for every singe decision you ever make, for every YES AND NO.
“THE ONLY LIMITS YOU HAVE, ARE THE LIMITS YOU BELIEVE” Wayne Dyer
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